It’s a Christmas miracle!!
from: Chiamaka Alice
to: spamcarnival
date: Mon, Dec 28, 2009 at 12:46 PM
subject: Economy in crysis and you?Erectile dysfunction will never spoil your life again if you make use of this sales event!
It is a scientifically proven fact that on Christmas many people get rid of impotence with magic!
[link removed]
Of course, the removed link goes to a Canadian pharmaceutical website. Here are some funny pictures from the site:
Leave a Comment » | 
Holidays, Love and Sex, Spamgasmic!, sexual enhancement | 
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Posted by spamcarnival
We're coming back in 2010!
Loyal Spam Carnival Fan: Where have you been?
Spam Carnival Blogger Candice: Sometimes, your job gets super hectic, and then you start taking classes at a nearby graduate school, and then you volunteer your time 15 hours a week for free… and then, before you know it, you don’t have the time to update your blog.
But don’t worry, because I dropped out of school and stopped volunteering my time towards a good cause, so now I can dedicate my life to what really matters: spam emails. And I’m gonna do it all on my office’s dime.
Thanks for sticking around all this time. In the meanwhile, why don’t you go on ahead forward us your favorite spam emails? spamcarnival@gmail.com.
Here’s a bonus spam email to tide you over, courtesy of my girlfriend Dana:
from: Nanny Justice
date: Tue, Aug 25, 2009 at 9:46 AM
subject: Huge love maker has become unbelievably real!
to: DanaMadness of low prices http://iceo.suffixevery.com/
Nanny Justice! I’m so glad she finally contacted us with this fantastic deal. Nanny Injustice usually tries to make my love maker unbelievably small, so thank the heavens for Nanny Justice- my favorite nanny!
Leave a Comment » | Funny Sender Name, Love and Sex, Spamgasmic!, sexual enhancement | Permalink
Posted by spamcarnival
“Pilules” make everything awesome.
from: 4u2
to: spamcarnival
date: Tue, Jun 30, 2009 at 9:10 PM
subject: Get woody of girls again!
Need a lion ardor and energy of a bull? Get it all, compressed in one pilule!~
http://rosstech.ca/1.html
fppphfadk
oofujwjo
Leave a Comment » | Love and Sex, Spamgasmic!, sexual enhancement | Permalink
Posted by spamcarnival
Dude, what is with the nasty attitude??? Chill out.
from: nagylaszlo
to: spamcarnival
date: Sat, Jun 6, 2009 at 5:18 AM
subject: If night are not hot enough, this pilule will light the fire again!
Suck it.
Leave a Comment » | Love and Sex, Spamgasmic!, sexual enhancement | Permalink
Posted by spamcarnival
Wow, this guy is really confident!
from: Marion Whitaker
to: spamcarnival
date: Sun, Mar 23, 2008 at 3:03 PM
subject: Lets bet that my penis is bigger than yours
Good morning.
Man, you must know it! I had an intimate trouble.
My banana was too small that I feel shy when I did it with my woman.
I was afraid that she would tell me about it and left me once it had happened.
I didn’t know what to do. I was depressed and always thought how I can change my life.
Once I received a letter with advertisement and decided to try it.
The result was unexpected. My main trouble was solved and now I am happy happy
happy happy Bro don’t waste time.
http://www.crippelarge.com
With best regards
Marion Whitaker
Leave a Comment » | Funny Subject Line, Love and Sex, Spamgasmic!, insulting, sexual enhancement | Permalink
Posted by spamcarnival
Your family will not stay together if you don’t take Viagra. That’s just how it is.
from: Lucille Milton
to: spamcarnival
date: Sat, Feb 21, 2009 at 7:00 AM
subject: Want to keep your family from breaking up? Take some bluepilules.
Leave a Comment » | Love and Sex, Spamgasmic!, sexual enhancement | Permalink
Posted by spamcarnival
Sometimes I get spam emails that are too similar to separate on their own. In fact, they are actually funnier to read as a set. Behold:
from: peter
to: spamcarnival
date: Sat, May 9, 2009 at 9:20 AM
subject: Can you explain this?
Take this, my Don Juan, so your body won’t let you down at hot rendezvous.
wulczitr uffvdep vsdjac
eyucintza u rsqlvyy
from: Leland Corseri
to: spamcarnival
date: Sat, May 2, 2009 at 1:06 PM
subject: Re: Huge 72% discount
After the night with you on that blue vitamin she will become excited of even thinking about you
from: Sarai Kagy
to: spamcarnival
date: Sat, May 2, 2009 at 2:47 PM
subject: Re: Huge 89% discount
Antivirals are our specialty, but other categories have a wide selection of competitively-priced goods too
Leave a Comment » | Love and Sex, Spamgasmic!, sexual enhancement | Permalink
Posted by spamcarnival
I received nine of the same email all in one day. I love spam trends!
Subject: For spamcarnival@gmail.com
Leave a Comment » | Love and Sex, Spamgasmic!, sexual enhancement | Permalink
Posted by spamcarnival
From the archives:
From: Alexander Leonardo
To: Tony Daniel
Sent: Tuesday, January 16, 2007 10:35 PM
Subject: why your weenie is so small? :))The Most Potent Male Muscle Boosting System!
The better and most powerful product to enlarge your meat available on the market!
This products tested, analyzed and approved by doctors.
Order Our Product NOW!
You can do it here: [link removed]
P.S.: If it doesn’t work for you, we garantee 100% of your money back!
–
liiqiiifitiqirgphriihuihiqfngjfrfjfggmgufhfogqjjfjgtfp
skldfjgdlsfkgjereriotuw
Ivan lost his temper.
‘You fool!’ he shouted, looking for the woman in the crowd. ‘ What’s
Wolff got to do with it? He didn’t do it … Wo, wa . . . No, I’ll never
remember it like this. Now look, everybody– ring up the police at once and
tell them to send five motorcycles and sidecars with machine-guns to catch
the professor. And don’t forget to say that there are two others with him–a
tall fellow in checks with a wobbly pince-nez and a great black cat. . . .
Meanwhile I’m going to search Griboyedov–I can sense that he’s here! ‘
Ivan was by now in a state of some excitement. Pushing the bystanders
aside he began waving his candle about, pouring wax on himself, and started
Wait a second — you can’t just cut the story off there! How am I supposed to know what happened to Ivan?
4 Comments | I've Been Renamed, Love and Sex, Short Story, Spamgasmic!, sexual enhancement | Tagged: insulting | Permalink
Posted by spamcarnival
I am so confused.
from: Shoger Sowders
to: spamcarnival
date: Wed, May 6, 2009 at 5:51 AM
subject: Projeccts Against sex Tours
I also received the same email with the following subject lines:
Leave a Comment » | Funny Sender Name, Funny Subject Line, Love and Sex, Spamgasmic!, sexual enhancement | Permalink
Posted by spamcarnival
Plain and simple.
from: Maribel
to: spamcarnival
date: Sun, May 3, 2009 at 4:25 AM
subject: Hello
Leave a Comment » | Best of the best, Love and Sex, Spamgasmic!, sexual enhancement | Permalink
Posted by spamcarnival
This subject line could be rewritten as “Bad breath and bad erection? Try this stuff.”
from: Kristin Lockwood
to: spamcarnival
date: Thu, May 7, 2009 at 12:56 PM
subject: Menthol Viagra ? fresh breath and fresh impressions!Regards Spamcarnival
*****************************************************************
If you want to get on the TV screen learn more about it!
Powerful, courageous, invincible ? is it about you?
Kristin Lockwood
*****************************************************************Menthol Viagra pills will rid you of the troubles!
I googled this, and apparently there’s no such thing as Menthol Viagra. Hmm…
Leave a Comment » | Love and Sex, Spamgasmic!, sexual enhancement | Permalink
Posted by spamcarnival
Wow.
from: Eqz
to: spamcarnival
date: Mon, Apr 6, 2009 at 4:18 PM
subject: Is that a bulch I see in your pants?Dear spamcarnival,
This newsletter is being sent to you because you agreed to receive information from Unavejuhq. If you no longer wish to receive our newsletters, please unsubscribe now to ensure you are taken off our mailing list rather than marking this email as “spam” or “junk”.
Copyright c 2009 Mevuku. All rights reserved.
Hey, what’s a bulch? I googled it and found an entry on urbandictionary:
1. Bulch
To eat the testicles of a dead man, usually old and preferably with hot sauce and rice
Once again… wow.
Leave a Comment » | Funny Subject Line, Love and Sex, Spamgasmic!, sexual enhancement | Permalink
Posted by spamcarnival
Well, if it isn’t Dr. Audy Quail!
from: Dr. Audy Quail
to: spamcarnival
date: Thu, Mar 12, 2009 at 6:34 PM
subject: Bye-bye to health problems!TAKE CONTROL OF YOUR HEALTH
Welcome spamcarnival!
My name is Dr. Audy Quail. Yes, that’s me at the right. I’d like to extend a personal ‘thank you’ for visiting my website. I’m confident you’ll come away with insightful facts, features, and information that can literally change your life!
Also, congratulations on your smart decision to subscribe to the world’s most popular online natural health newsletter.
By subscribing, you’re demonstrating a solid commitment to your own health.
My mission for over 10 years has been to help you improve your health. And I am quite passionate about that goal!
Wishing you optimal health and wellness,
Dr. Audy Quail
Note: If you’ve somehow received this message in error, you can unsubscribe. Also, we continually strive to improve this website, so if you encounter any problems or issues, click here to contact our customer support department.
It should be noted that I received this spam email a total of five times. The only thing that changed were the names of the doctors and the subject lines. Here are the others:
from: Dr. Catalin seyzad
subject: Your Car is scratched
from: Dr. Farhan petrecca
subject: Guess who invites you!
from: Dr. Eddee Vallineva
subject: Any ideas about printer?
from: New report system test. Open
subject: Dr. Grant Portielje
Leave a Comment » | Lame Product for Sale, Love and Sex, Spamgasmic!, sexual enhancement | Permalink
Posted by spamcarnival
Wow, I am having such a great time on Twitter. I’m really making a lot of new friends and reaching out to some people who have become spam enthusiasts. I’ve been lucky enough to have received three submissions from people following Spam Carnival on Twitter.
A very lovely man named Liam passed this one on to me. It is literally one of the funniest spam emails I have seen in a long time, and I’ve never received one like this myself. Behold!
from: Avis Duffy
to: Liam D.
sent: Monday, March 30, 2009 4:25 PM
subject: The friend in your pants will raise his head up.Just put that picture-link to visit our store
4. i don’t worry about a little “creative clutter” in cate’s room. i say, a good dress up/ barbie mess day better than watching tv all afternoon, right? pretty soon i will just put my ‘kerchief on again and go to town. (yes, that is what cate’s room looks like again, just over a month after the big clean. i tell you, i’m fighting a losing battle with that girl). does that answer your question, mary? i hope it helps! wink.good news!
when she does these weekends she fills up really fast so don’t wait- if you need color and/or cut and/or face waxing at very reasonable prices email her promptly and she’ll get you booked and give you directions.
2. to keep the bedrooms clear i throw all the dirty laundry in the laundry room and shut the door. out of sight, out of mind!
you’ve gotta love people with humor like that.
(so is corned beef if you’ve never tried it).
i am looking forward to a date with grant.
time for a new spring look… fix
i made this one for a gift, but i’ve already cast on another for moi.
and i love it (thanks, coco).
trust me, you’ll want her working her magic on you.
she’s cute
ps- did i say i would sew this past saturday? i meant next saturday! haha!
corned beef is cheap meat, a head of cabbage is less than 50 cents, and i bet you have all the ingredients for the bread in your cupboard. you should make this meal tonight!
my sister and hair stylist, coco, is coming to utah county once again to meet our hair needs.
interested? i think it would be so fun.
doesn’t she look like lucy from chronicles of narnia?
she wears birkenstocks to fashion shows.
let’s give a hand to the world, for everything it can do!!
where you can get great steak and shrimp is this ELLE
i am determined to get the house clean so i can relax and sew tomorrow.
she never looks like a senator from krypton on the red carpet.
happy happy days.
and totally not what you are supposed to be eating
we ate corned beef and cabbage with irish soda bread last night in preparation for the day of the irish.
i am trying to be a patient, kind mom.
last minute trip to idaho to see my sister- so much better than home blogging!
My favorite line here is definitely “she never looks like a senator from krypton on the red carpet. “ What’s yours?
Leave a Comment » | Best of the best, Love and Sex, Spamgasmic!, sexual enhancement | Permalink
Posted by spamcarnival
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